Life in the Balance: Let Go of Your Anger, Live a Happier Life Pt. 1

I've always wondered the reason behind my angers. Was it usually necessary? Was it anger onto myself? Or caused by the people around me? Really. I've been living in anger for so long to the point that I would go into a deep wonder of finding the root to those angers.

Tbh, I've always known the reason behind every single time I get angry. I really do. But someone once said to me that we can't control when we get angry. It happens for any reason, whether it's caused by people or our own self. But what's important is how we handle that anger. How do we take it upon us. That's the only thing that matters. When we feel angry and turn it into resentment, that would definitely suppress us from seeing beyond finding for a solution. But if we accept the anger (yes, accept) and see it as a bump in life to greater things, be it a better outcome or a good change to ourselves, eventually, we'll learn to let go of the anger inflicted upon us. That's the main key to live a happier life.

I have a lot of quote cards on the clipboard at my workstation at home. Every time I get stuck while doing work or when I'm in deep thoughts, I would just stare at those cards. Some times, I would read every single one of it repeatedly, but most of the time, I would just blank stare at them. But one day, one of those cards really caught my eye. It's this saying from our beloved genius, Albert Einstein, "Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow." It's been there for so long and finally, on that day, it just hit me. At that point of time, I had this big resentment towards my husband because of something that I wasn't happy about. And it wasn't just him. It was everything. Him. Me. The situation. Responsibilities. Work. Money. Every single problem in life, marriage, EVERYTHING. Every possible common problems living an adult life. Those resentments had been the content of my heart for so long that it was boiling at that point. So, I kept saying that particular quote repeatedly. As if it was a sacred chant. And I felt a sudden change in me. Yeah. Cliché. But it's true. My heart wasn't "palpitating" anymore. I just felt calmer. It was like I saw something. Perhaps, a clue to my solution.

Here's how I saw things at that time. "Learn from yesterday" was the anger I had within me. Resentment, hatred, whatever you want to call it. "Live for today" was what I would do to deal with it. My effort. "Hope for tomorrow" I suppose, was for a happier me. For a happier life. It may not make sense to some of you. But that's how I saw it, even until today.

So what the hell was I supposed to do? I mean, I can't just keep chanting that quote every time I feel shitty, now can I? It doesn't work that way but if only it's that easy. So how do I let go of my anger? That was actually the first thing on my mind and that was it! Let go. I've just got to let it all out. Whatever anger, resentment and anything that  have been damaging me inside, I've just got to let them go. Out of my system. These negativities never really go away, you know. They just keep building up within and eventually, they'll explode. Like a balloon that keeps inflating. It will pop, eventually. So, let it go. Even if we feel like keeping it all inside and not burst out crying seem like the adult, mature thing to do, we're wrong. So wrong. Bottling up our anger does damage our well being as well as our mental health.

The question is, how do we let it all out? Do we just lose control? Tbh, it's not easy to keep our temper in check when we've been boiling up so much anger inside. Once they come out, they'll erupt like a volcano that has been dormant for a century. Well, what I did was find a friend who understands me the best and who would not just say things that I want to hear but would give me the advice I needed to make sure I was able to achieve what I need to achieve. In this case, to let all that anger, resentment and hate out. Find someone to vent out, not just once, but from time to time. We can't keep holding on to anger for long anymore. We got to find an exit for them to come out.

Let go. That's the first effort that has really helped me cope with my anger. In my next post, I would be sharing more efforts on my journey to a balanced, happier life. But for now, if you've been holding on to something that has been hurting you for so long, try to let it go. It doesn't go away all at once. Believe me, I'm still battling with my own demons. Take it slow at your own pace and take a breather whenever you feel like exploding. Cry if you need to. Talk to yourself if you must. Those are also ways to let it out of your system. Trust me, in time, it's going to get better.